Man. Is it already Thursday again? This week just kind of disappeared. We decided to put our house up for sale next Monday so I have been crazy this week trying to get stuff packed up and cleaned out and ready to go. I am starting to freak out a little because there is still so much to be done. I have to get it all cleaned out and packed up by tomorrow night because Saturday morning my mom is coming to help me scrub the place clean. Fun times.
This is going to have to be a quick think because I have a lot going on and I have a birthday party right in the middle of it in just a few hours. (Happy 8th B-day to my Princess Emily!)
On Sunday night, as we were discussing the attire for the following day, Emily told me that it didn't matter if she wore green or not because her teacher said that she was going to give everyone that wasn't wearing green a green sticker to wear because there would be no pinching in her class. Now don't get me wrong. I love Emily's teacher. I wish I had her patience and grace. But really, who gave her permission to suck all the fun out of St. Patrick's day? This is also the class where you cannot bring an invitation to a birthday party for anyone in the class if you don't have an invitation to pass out to everyone. I can understand her desire to keep order in her class room and make sure no one feel left out. But this whole "no pinching" on the day-of-all-pinching got me ta thinkin'.
Every thing you do now a days with kids has to be equal. You have a contest, everyone has to be a winner of some sort. You have a sporting event, EVERYBODY gets a trophy, both sides, because there are no winner or losers. Is that really fair? What about the kids who work really hard and do their very best and put forth a great amount of effort to succeed. Is it fair to reward the kid who did really nothing at all in the same way as you reward this other kid who really tried hard?
I mean I know that there are kids out there who have it hard. Life is just unfair for them from the beginning. I just finished reading a book that is a true story of a woman who grew up in extreme poverty with slightly crazy parents. She and her brother and sisters basically had to fend for themselves from the time they were born. They scrounged in trash cans for food to eat. They have grown up now to be very successful adults. The woman who wrote the book is now a journalist who works for MSNBC. I wonder if she and her brother and sisters, if they were born in a different set of circumstances, would they be the same successful people they are today? If they grew up in middle class suburbia where they really didn't have to work hard to achieve, if they were just handed a trophy because they showed up, would they have learned to apply themselves and really work hard?
Is that the problem with kids these days? They just expect to be patted on the back and have someone say great job, and hand them their reward when they really did nothing to earn it? I don't know. It could be part of it.
Some people say competition is unfair because if there is a winner, they are a winner because everyone else is a loser. And no one wants to be a loser. But, competition is a way of life. These kids are going to grow up and enter a world where they will have to compete in order to get good grades in college and get a good job and keep a good job. You hear about "healthy competition". Is competition healthy?
I really don't know what the answer is. I think there has to be some kind of balance somewhere. I just am not sure what that balance is.
I don't know if this made any sense. I really didn't have a clear thought on what I was going to say when I sat down to type it. It just kind of came out. I really have to go now, but I just wanted to give you something to think about today.
This is going to have to be a quick think because I have a lot going on and I have a birthday party right in the middle of it in just a few hours. (Happy 8th B-day to my Princess Emily!)
On Sunday night, as we were discussing the attire for the following day, Emily told me that it didn't matter if she wore green or not because her teacher said that she was going to give everyone that wasn't wearing green a green sticker to wear because there would be no pinching in her class. Now don't get me wrong. I love Emily's teacher. I wish I had her patience and grace. But really, who gave her permission to suck all the fun out of St. Patrick's day? This is also the class where you cannot bring an invitation to a birthday party for anyone in the class if you don't have an invitation to pass out to everyone. I can understand her desire to keep order in her class room and make sure no one feel left out. But this whole "no pinching" on the day-of-all-pinching got me ta thinkin'.
Every thing you do now a days with kids has to be equal. You have a contest, everyone has to be a winner of some sort. You have a sporting event, EVERYBODY gets a trophy, both sides, because there are no winner or losers. Is that really fair? What about the kids who work really hard and do their very best and put forth a great amount of effort to succeed. Is it fair to reward the kid who did really nothing at all in the same way as you reward this other kid who really tried hard?
I mean I know that there are kids out there who have it hard. Life is just unfair for them from the beginning. I just finished reading a book that is a true story of a woman who grew up in extreme poverty with slightly crazy parents. She and her brother and sisters basically had to fend for themselves from the time they were born. They scrounged in trash cans for food to eat. They have grown up now to be very successful adults. The woman who wrote the book is now a journalist who works for MSNBC. I wonder if she and her brother and sisters, if they were born in a different set of circumstances, would they be the same successful people they are today? If they grew up in middle class suburbia where they really didn't have to work hard to achieve, if they were just handed a trophy because they showed up, would they have learned to apply themselves and really work hard?
Is that the problem with kids these days? They just expect to be patted on the back and have someone say great job, and hand them their reward when they really did nothing to earn it? I don't know. It could be part of it.
Some people say competition is unfair because if there is a winner, they are a winner because everyone else is a loser. And no one wants to be a loser. But, competition is a way of life. These kids are going to grow up and enter a world where they will have to compete in order to get good grades in college and get a good job and keep a good job. You hear about "healthy competition". Is competition healthy?
I really don't know what the answer is. I think there has to be some kind of balance somewhere. I just am not sure what that balance is.
I don't know if this made any sense. I really didn't have a clear thought on what I was going to say when I sat down to type it. It just kind of came out. I really have to go now, but I just wanted to give you something to think about today.
5 comments:
This isn't as exciting as last weeks, but I will still respond.
I am one of those mom's that says to my child "Suck it up and get over it! Life isn't always fair."
I completely agree with you on this. They have to learn when they go into the real world there is plenty of competition and winners and losers. Sometimes you lose and sometimes you win. You need to learn to be gracious in both cases.
Of course, winning is always preferable.
Hmmmm....I tell my kids to "suck it up" all the time too.
I'm with you on the need for winners/losers. I think it's the parents lack of parenting that has caused all this.
Ooh, I think this is interesting. From a teacher's standpoint I see the need for equality. However, I think that there need to be rewards for working hard and achieving success, otherwise the kids won't have anything to work towards. Every kid is different, though-you have to support everyone, without coddling...it is a tough situation sometimes.
Well... I have one child who is SUPER sensitive. I go the extra mile for to avoid the major meltdowns. I probably do it more for me than for her. I have another child who will kick butt in sports and school. So I am on the fence about his one. Maybe I will have more of an opinion when my kids are older.
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